We’ve all had moments where we wish we could change something about ourselves. Whether it’s an external aspect like appearance or internal traits such as mindset or habits, the desire for transformation is a natural part of growth. In my own journey, I once asked myself, “What would I change about myself?” But as I embarked on this path, I realized that the key wasn’t about changing who I was — it was about embracing self-growth and trust in the process.
In this blog post, I’ll share the 10 things I would change about myself, the pivotal moments that shifted my perspective, and how focusing on trust and self-compassion brought me to a more empowered version of who I am today.
1. Understanding Myself
When I thought about changing aspects of myself, the first thing that came up was realizing where my true power resides. For so long, I believed my power was external — in the opinions of others, in achievements, in material success. What I discovered was that true power comes from within.
I shifted my focus from trying to meet external expectations to tapping into my inner strength. This realization allowed me to stop people-pleasing and start making choices that were aligned with my authentic self.
2. Trusting Myself
One of the major changes I wanted to make was learning to trust myself. For years, I second-guessed my decisions, and every move was driven by the fear of making a mistake. This self-doubt held me back, especially in work and relationships.
I started to understand that trust isn’t something external — it’s about believing that I have the strength to navigate life’s challenges and that I’ll grow from them. Trusting myself wasn’t about being perfect, but about having faith in my ability to figure things out, no matter what comes my way.
3. Letting Go of Self-Sabotage
A major part of my self-growth involved letting go of self-sabotage. For years, I’d work hard towards something, only to hold myself back right before success. Whether it was fear of failure or the belief that I didn’t deserve success, I realized that these patterns had to stop.
By focusing on self-compassion and patience, I was able to break free from these self-destructive behaviors. I learned that growth isn’t about striving for perfection but about accepting myself through every stage of the journey.
4. Shifting from External Validation to Self-Worth
For much of my life, I sought external validation — approval from others, recognition at work, and success in all the traditional ways. However, I found that relying on external sources of validation only made me feel more disconnected from who I really was.
I began shifting my focus to internal self-worth, recognizing that my value isn’t determined by what others think. True self-esteem comes from knowing who I am and accepting myself unconditionally.
5. Prioritizing Myself
A huge part of the change I wanted to make was simply learning to prioritize myself. For too long, I put the needs of others before my own, constantly running on empty. It took time, but I realized that I couldn’t pour from an empty cup.
By setting boundaries and focusing on my own well-being, I became more present and effective in all areas of my life.
6. Breaking Free from Comparison
One of the most destructive habits I had was comparing myself to others. It took a toll on my self-esteem and my mental health. I constantly measured my worth against the achievements of those around me.
When I shifted my focus to personal growth, I stopped worrying about what others were doing. Instead, I began to value my own journey, realizing that my path was unique and that comparison was stealing my peace.
7. Building Real Confidence
Confidence was something I always struggled with. I used to look for ways to build it externally — through accomplishments, recognition, and appearances. But real confidence isn’t about proving yourself to others; it’s about trusting who you are, flaws and all.
By focusing on self-compassion and embracing vulnerability, I built a more authentic confidence that came from within.
8. Accepting Imperfection
For much of my life, I had a mindset of perfectionism — believing that anything less than perfect wasn’t good enough. This belief kept me stuck, always striving but never satisfied.
The key to true transformation was accepting imperfection. I learned to embrace mistakes as opportunities to learn and grow. Perfection isn’t the goal; growth and learning are what matter.
9. Letting Go of Fear
Fear has been one of my greatest obstacles. Whether it was fear of failure, fear of what others might think, or fear of the unknown, it kept me small. But as I embraced self-trust and compassion, I realized that fear didn’t have to control me.
Now, I face fear as an opportunity to grow. I’m learning to step into the unknown with confidence, knowing that each challenge is a chance to become a better version of myself.
10. Enjoying the Journey
The final thing I realized I needed to change was my relationship with the journey itself. I spent so much time focusing on the end goal that I forgot to enjoy the process.
Today, I’m more present and appreciative of each step in the journey. Instead of stressing about what’s next, I embrace where I am right now, knowing that every experience is part of my growth.
Conclusion
Making these changes wasn’t about trying to be someone else. It was about uncovering who I truly am and allowing that person to shine. Self-growth is not about fixing yourself; it’s about understanding yourself more deeply and embracing every part of who you are. If you’re feeling stuck or unsure where to begin, remember that change is a process, and it starts from within.
Start small. Trust yourself. And enjoy the journey.
